love day 11

7:55 PM

Love is undeniable (Randy post)

Hey folks! Randy here. :) I don't blog very often. I'm not a very good writer, but I thought I'd say a little something about this "love month" stuff. 

I don't like to get very sappy, so I'll do my best not to. Just hang in there.

Love is undeniable.

Even when you don't want to be in love. I'll tell you a quick little story. I didn't want to be in love. I grew up my whole life thinking that I wouldn't even think of falling in love until after my mission. All of my primary teachers would ask us if we would be willing to give up a car or a girlfriend or an education to go on a mission. At the time, I thought, "I don't have any of those things it should be pretty easy!" I was very wrong.

Going on a mission was very difficult for me. I would tell myself all the time that I wasn't falling in love with Maddy. If you've heard the story, you know that I kept telling myself that for some time. Eventually, I couldn't suppress my feelings any longer. I told her how I felt and was a lot more honest with the people around me. It felt good! However, I also had a burning desire to serve a mission. I love this gospel more than anything. There was just a lot of this love business going on during that emotional time of my life. It almost felt like I was choosing Maddy or The Lord.

 I made the decision to leave on a mission even if it meant not spending my life with Maddy. I knew that I would be blessed for serving a mission. Especially if I gave everything I had. However, I still couldn't deny that I loved Maddy and hoped she'd be around when I got home. I got a lot of grief for choosing to write Maddy while serving a mission, but I'm grateful I made the choices I made.

Love hurts sometimes. That was one of the most painful times of my life, and it felt like it would have been easier to stop loving Maddy or stop loving The Church. You can't do it though. If you really love something, you can't just stop. I had to let go of Maddy for two years, but there wasn't a day that I didn't love her while I was gone.

Anyway, I didn't want to be sappy and I unfortunately fell in the trap. Another side story: after I got married, I started crying in movies all the time. I guess I'm a sap now. Oh darn!

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