So I was sitting in my room for approximately the length of one romantic comedy tonight, feeling sorry for myself for a million reasons. And then I realized I needed to blog. So I started thinking about what I was thankful for today. And sitting down, typing this out has made me realize it. I am so grateful for my trials. I am grateful for them because they've made me stronger. I am so blessed because through my trials I have been able to come to know how much my Heavenly Father loves me. Every single one of my trials comes at a point where I'm starting to get comfortable, and maybe not relying on my Heavenly Father as much as I should. Then during a trial I have to turn to Him for help. And He always helps me, and along the way I find out once again how much He loves me and looks out for me. So today, I am grateful for the times when life isn't easy and when things get rough. They're the times that ultimately make me the happiest. And I couldn't think of a better way to end this month of gratitude. So look for more gratitude posts, I'm sure they'll pop up here and there. Have a wonderful December everyone:)

November 29. Today I am grateful for my past. I don't have a perfect past, nobody does. There are some things I wish I could change. Things I wish I had or hadn't said. Things I wish I had or hadn't done. People I should have helped and more times when I should have been happy. But everything that has happened, everyone that I have encountered has made me who I am today. And that's something to be thankful for. So even though the past is full of imperfection, regret, and nostalgia, I don't think I would really change a thing. Because I like who I am and more importantly, I like where I'm headed. I like the person I'm trying to become. And because of the person I was, I can become that person. That person who is nicer and more patient, more loving and helpful. So today, I am grateful to all the people I know or have known, all the mistakes I have made and all the things I have learned. Here's to all the things that happened to make me, me.

Throwback Thursday photos anyone?

November 27--Today I am grateful for the Book of Mormon. I'm reading it for my BOM class, and also reading it from beginning to end in a specific time frame for a personal reason. Can I just say that I love reading and rereading, but always getting something new out of that amazing book. It truly is a gift from Heavenly Father, and it is one that I treasure. If you haven't read it in a while, or haven't read it at all, please do. I promise it'll change your life.

November 28--Today I am grateful for bathtubs. At college I don't have a bathtub, just a shower (which is still a wonderful thing in and of itself.) But there is something glorious about bathtubs. And today I'm missing mine at home.

In other news, college is hard. Gearing up for finals is stressful. Gearing up for cleaning checks and final walk-through's is stressful. Not feeling so hot on top of all of that is stressful too. But I am still a lucky girl. And I won't forget that anytime soon.

Thanksgiving is over. And yet, my gratitude posts aren't. I really like this whole being thankful thing. So I'm finishing out the month of gratitude posts and hopefully doing more posts full of things I am blessed with. Because I am blessed with a lot.

November 25. Today I am glad for Christmas. I got to decorate my house with my family, listen to Christmas music ALL DAY and even decorate our little apartment with a wimpy tree and twinkle lights. There's something awesome about Christmas. And I am sad that a majority of December I won't be with my family, I am so glad that I can feel close to them when the Christmas tree scents are everywhere, as well as every time I hear Jingle Bell Rock. So yay for the season of giving, and I am grateful I live in a place where I can celebrate, and remember.

November 26. Today I am glad for electricity. I cooked dinner today, and I think I would have died as a pioneer. I can make decent food, but only if I have the oven and the stove working for me. So I am grateful for dear old Ben and his discovery of electricity, and for Edison who finally turned on the light, and all those other guys who made my life so much easier. Thank you.:)


In other news. Being reunited with my best friends is awesome. And I hit Sarah in the eye with a cookie, for which I am truly sorry. Also Mom, I miss you. Thanks for letting me cry yesterday. Have a wonderful day everyone!

I am behind in this blogging every day of November thing. So let's catch-up (once again) and get November taken care of eh?

November 22. Thanksgiving day. Today I am grateful for my knowledge of and opportunity to have an eternal family. My extended family is just awesome and I love spending time with them, especially during the holidays. They are wonderful people who make me laugh, sympathize when necessary, and never fail to ask what's going on in my life. I wouldn't be who I am without them and I am grateful for them all, from Grandpa down to little Lindsay.

November 23. It's the day after Thanksgiving, also known as BLACK FRIDAY. So today I am grateful for all the wonderful service workers who provide many services for me, and you, each day. From doctors, to firemen, to retail clerks, to lawyers, to police officers, to the computer guy, to the dentist, to cooks, to teachers, and all the other professions that allow me to live the way I live, thank you for all you do.

November 24. Today I am so grateful the talks I can have with my parents. I'm not perfect (mom can attest to that eh?) but I am so grateful my parents overlook that about me and always find the time to sit up and chat with me about anything even though I was rude ten minutes earlier. They're the best, and I love knowing they'll listen to me and also give the best advice about everything. So thanks Mom and Dad. Love you!

So many things are happening that make me unable to blog! So here's the 20 and 21, and tonight I will post the 22:)

November 20
I am grateful that I have such a wonderful place to call home. True, Kaysville is funny and small and everything, but the memories I have here are amazing. I love my house here, my neighbors and especially my family. I love that I can walk around the corner to my Grandma's house. I love the high school and the theatre and the ballet studio and everything. I don't miss Kaysville as much as I miss the people, the memories, the little things. So here's to being back in Kaysville and having such an amazing place, and such amazing people, to call my home.

November 21
Today I am grateful for mission calls. Randy got his call today and I am a basket case of emotions. The whole day was long and dragged out and I'm sure it was fifty times worse for him. And then we were sitting there and he was reading it and I still think it all may be a dream. And I heard the emotion in his voice, and saw his face when he read it, and I knew he was going to Japan. He wanted to more than anything in the whole world. And he's going there, to Fukuoka to be exact. And when he said that I knew it was perfect. I'm not sure what kind of sound escaped from my mouth but I am so happy for him. Then he picked me up and spun me around and it was so perfect. I am so proud of that boy I can't even explain it. So today I am so grateful that the Lord knows us so well to know exactly when Randy needed to go, to know exactly where he needed to go, and to allow me to be a part of his life for so long. Here's to my best friend and the many lives he's going to change with the help of the Lord.

Happy Thanksgiving all....another post to come after the festivities of the day!

Today I am grateful for books. I love reading more than just about anything. I love words and I love writing (see I'm writing a blog...weird right?) I can't get enough of A Tree Grows In Brooklyn, or Pride and Prejudice, or A Tale of Two Cities, or Harry Potter, or any fiction novel full of cheesy lines and predictable plots. There's something to me about losing yourself in someone else's life, someone else's story. I can't tell you how many times I find myself writing a sentence about things that are going on in my life, snippets of a possible story that I'll probably never get around to writing. So as I am grateful for books and words and writers, I would like to share a few of these sentences or snippets. Here goes nothing.

She couldn't help being beautiful. There's just something about long eyelashes and deep blue eyes, framed under raven black hair that call up memories of princesses and dragons.

She didn't know if today was upside down or if she was. She just knew that for some reason, she couldn't move her mouth properly.

There's something exciting about a Monday, something unexpected and yet so mundane and ordinary you can't help but laugh about it.

The crisp air felt like September. It tasted like September. It smelt and felt and sounded like September. It was like sharp pencils and squeaky desks, new clothes and no scuff marks on the gym floor. That's what the wind was today.

Normally snow was her least favorite thing, but on a night like tonight it was too perfect. It fell softly like too much whipped cream, and was the most mesmerizing color under the street lights.

He sang songs, took out the trash, rubbed her feet, brought ice cream instead of flowers, shared his soda and popcorn, and always let her choose the movie. He was perfect.

She loved the way her high heels sounded on the pavement. A woman never stops traffic in ballet flats or tennis shoes; it's in heels.

Well enough for tonight:)

Be prepared for a HUGE post. I haven't posted in far too long and I have three days to cover!


November 16. Today I am grateful for the things that make my house, my house. I love the beautiful piano and the computer room and my bedroom and our kitchen and flopping on the living room couch and my chair in the basement and my closet and fold out mirrors. There's something amazing and wonderful about going home.

November 17. Today I am grateful that I had the chance to do Musical Productions. I am so blessed to have spent two years working with some amazing people and learning so much. I wouldn't trade my time in Productions for anything in the world. Curtains and Fiddler and the Revue's that came after were so perfect and I can't even explain it. There's something magical about showing up to the empty auditorium at 6:00 AM and dancing your heart out while trying to sing at the same time. There's something wonderful about sitting in Bonnie's basement and going over lines and songs and crying with everyone. There's something fun about staging the show and watching it fall together right before your eyes. There's something incredible about opening night and the anticipation before every single show. There's something amazing about singing and acting with your best friends and knowing they're right behind you. And something perfect about the flood of emotion you feel when you have to walk off for the last time and leave everything. So today I am grateful for every single person involved and every single memory I have of my time on that stage.

November 18. Today I am grateful for sleep. I didn't get a lot of that today. And then I took a nap. On Rachel's bed. With Rach and Sar and Al. And then Lau came in and promptly left again because we were all asleep. So today I am grateful for realizing how important sleep is and the fact that in two days I get to go home and do a lot more sleeping.

Today I am grateful for ballet. My sisters opened The Nutcracker tonight and I couldn't be more proud of them. Dance is a huge part of who I am, and I know I would be totally different without it. There's something amazing about being on the stage, about dressing up in the pretty costume and wearing makeup, about putting on pointe shoes for the first time, about putting your warm hand on a cold barre, about taking that final bow before the curtain closes. I can't even explain it. I miss it more than words can say and I am so grateful my mom was inspired to enroll me in ballet when I was three years old. It was literally the best thing she could have done for me. So today, as my wonderful sisters open a show, here's a shout-out to the art form that literally shaped who I am today. Here's to every plie and tondue and pirouette and fouette and corset costume and burned toe shoe ribbon and baby powdered gel pad and the thousands of bobby pins and the girls who became my family as we spent 5+ hours together each week. Here's to dance.

So today I am grateful for church callings. I had the opportunity to go to a training meeting yesterday where Sister Burton, the Relief Society General President, was speaking. She was so amazing and it was incredible to get to learn from her. We are so blessed to have the church leaders that we do, and it was such an eye opener to me of all the things they do for this gospel. Sister Burton and Elder Lund of the 70 spoke about the Lord hastening his work, and how every single thing we do in the church is a manifestation of that hastening. Elder Lund talked about striking the set for a play, something I can relate to 100%. He talked about how the old set is being taken down and a new one is being put up for us, the actors. He told us that it's up to us to make sure the new "set" is ready and that we're ready for that new "set." I can't even explain the Spirit that Sister Burton brought to the meeting. It was amazing. I learned so many valuable things not only for my Relief Society sisters but also for the rest of my life. One of the final things she told us was that callings are a gift, and when we start viewing them as a gift that Heavenly Father has given us, they will truly become one. So today I am grateful for the calling I have right now and the callings I have had and will have. Every single calling is a gift, and I'm so grateful for the trust Heavenly Father placed in me to have church callings.

Oh my WORD I am a day behind. So here is November 13---

Today I am grateful for simple things that make me happy. We rented a puppy today and he was literally the cutest thing in the whole world. We got to play with him for an hour and AH I can't even explain how amazing he was. His name was Wesley and he's a baby goldendoodle. Just getting to run around with him for an hour was one of the highlights of my week. I got to have mac and cheese and watch my favorite British sitcom, I got to go Spark for a peach ring drink with my best friends, and spend some time with the nicest guy in the world. Basically I am realizing throughout this month that there are so many little things that I am grateful for and that make me happy. So today I am just so grateful for those simple pleasures.



Don't worry, today's post is still to come!

So I'm a day behind. SO I'll post for the 12th right now, and the 13th later tonight :)

So November 12.
Today I am grateful for a clean house. We had cleaning checks today, and everything is one million times nicer when things are clean. I'm grateful for my parents for teaching me how to clean and always having a clean  house, and my roommates who all worked hard so our house is clean and wonderful. It seems super weird to be blathering on about how nice it is to have things clean...but it literally drives me crazy when it's not clean. Anyway that is what I am grateful for today :)

Today I am so grateful for those who gave their lives so that I could live here where I do today. I couldn't enjoy the freedoms I do today without those brave men and women who lived and died for my rights. I am so blessed to live where and how I do.

Today being Veteran's Day makes me think of the opportunity I had to be in Europe this summer. In Europe I went to two American military cemeteries, one in Italy and one in France. I can honestly say being in both those cemeteries, I felt the Spirit stronger than I did in any of the churches or cathedrals on the whole trip.

In the cemetery in Italy the groundskeeper talked about the campaigns in Italy during WWII and how many graves there were and such. The thing that struck me the most was when he talked about all the graves that are marked, not with a name, but with "Here lies a comrade in arms known only to God." Then the groundskeeper said, "Think about this. Not only did these men get their future taken away from them, they had their past taken away too." After he said that and we spent time walking around, I sobbed.

So I didn't do November 9th and I need to do today before it's tomorrow! If that makes any sense. So here we go!

November 9th
Today I am grateful for the chance I have to go to BYU. I love Provo and this school and just the whole feeling here so much. I love going to games and feeling a part of something huge. I love everyone being so sweet when they see you on campus, guys opening the door for you, being around people I love and everything else. I'm learning so much from BYU and I am so glad I get to be here!

November 10th.
I am so grateful for music. It is one of the most wonderful gifts Heavenly Father gave us. I can't even express the emotions that music brings to me, all I know is that I am who I am because of music. It is so easy to get lost in a melody or completely relate to the lyrics of a song. AH I just love it :)

Also, this weekend I got a visit from Jackson and Dylan. Which was awesome. I haven't seen all the people from the good old days for a while, and it was nice to catch up. I have missed them and I'm so glad I have awesome friends who take time out of their busy lives to see me :)

So I forgot to do this last night. But I'm doing it now so it's totally fine.

Today I am grateful for my roommates and friends here at BYU. They are the most awesome people who care about me so much and I want to spend a second giving them each a shout out.

Rachel. Rachel is crazy and I love that about her. Rachel is the kind of girl I always secretly want to be but never am. She's fun and always makes me laugh and genuinely cares about me. I was super intimidated by her at the beginning of the year, but now that I know her, I know she's sweet and funny and super smart. I love you Rach!

Heidi. She's the best bed-mate a person could ask for. She's so sweet and caring. She always makes time in her crazy schedule to talk to me and ask how I'm doing. Heidi makes me feel comfortable here at school and she's so amazing. I love you Heidi!!

Kathryn. Well I just love Kathryn so much. She's artsy and listens to good music and always has the funniest remarks that leave us rolling on the ground. Kathryn is quiet when you first meet her, but then she opens up and you hear her cute laugh and you just have to love her. She's my FHE mom and is so good at it. I love you Kathryn!!

Rebecca. She's the sassy pants of the house (weird right?) She always says the craziest, funniest things and makes us all laugh. She is always baking or cooking something, which we all love, and always willing to share with us. She's super fun and loves to come in and just chat, which I love. I love you Becca!

Jett. Jett is beautiful and smart and all the boys love her. At first I secretly was so jealous of her, and I still am, I'm just more open about it. Jett knows how to have fun and knows how to be serious. She has an opinion and isn't usually afraid to share it (like someone else I know...;)) and has such a strong testimony. Jett always makes us laugh in this apartment and we all love her for it. I WUV you Jett!!

Alli. Holy cow I love Alli. She's one of the sweetest people I know and Rachel and I feel like we corrupt her. One time we stole a girl's candy bar....but that's another story. Alli always lets me know she cares about me, which is something I love about her. She is so funny when she lets it out, and is so nice to everyone it's unreal. I love you Alli!

Sarah. Sarah is Tyra Banks, basically. She's beautiful and so funny and good at EVERYTHING. And she's still so humble about everything that she's done, which I love about her. Sarah always makes me feel invited and welcome. She's loud and crazy and doesn't care what people think about her, something I envy about her. She's just awesome really. I love you Sar!

Lauren. Lauren is beautiful and good at so many things and smart, and to top it all off, she's hilarious. Lauren doesn't care what people think about her either, and doesn't mind saying or doing something crazy no matter what the situation. She's beautiful on the dance floor and just as beautiful when she's at my house late at night watching movies. Lauren lets me know she loves me all the time, and I appreciate it so much. I love you Lauren!!!

So these are the girls I'm grateful for today. They make me feel like I'm irreplaceable, something I absolutely love. We laugh and cry and have gotten so close in such a short time. Rach and Sarah and Alli (HOPEFULLY) and I are already planning to live together next year (since everyone else is going on missions) and I can't wait for the awesome times ahead with these cute girls. I love you all!!!!

So today as I was thinking of what I was grateful for, and I got on Ashley's blog. And I started bawling because she posted about me.

So today, I am grateful for the friends I don't deserve. I don't keep in touch with them anywhere near as much as I should and I am really sorry for that guys. But I hope they know how much I love them.

Hailee is one of the most amazing people I know. I look up to Hailee in so many ways. She has such an amazing testimony which will make her an incredible missionary, she's so sweet and kind to everyone, she genuinely cares about people and doesn't fail to show them. She's just all around a wonderful person and I am so lucky to know her. Hailee I love you so much!

Ashley. What can I say about this girl? She has blessed my life in so many ways and I am so lucky to know her. Ash and I are so similar and we love all the same things, which makes me happy. Ash cares about people and fights for them, like she's been fighting for me since this whole college thing happened. I love her so so so much.

Emi. Emi is one of the funniest most sarcastic people I know. Yet she always makes sure to let me know she cares about me. She's a true friend, one who is honest but tells you the truth with love. Em knows how to have fun and I adore that about her. So even though I don't know much about how her life is going, I hope she knows how much I love her.

Kira freaking Holmes. I miss this girl like crazy. Kira is the cutest, funniest little sister ever and I miss her crazy comments. Kira never failed to make me laugh and never failed to make me feel loved and important. And she still does. Kira, I'm still waiting for you to come visit ya know ;)

Emily. Em and I pretended we were twins to drive people crazy. Which is fun. She's so much like me and loves to push me to my limits. And then I pretend to be angry and she feels bad, which makes me feel bad. It's just a wonderful friendship all around.

Allison Grant is a crazy crazy girl and I adore her. She makes me smile and laugh and always makes me feel important by asking for my advice. Even though it's usually pretty bad advice. She's so fun to be around and always makes me happy.

Haley Young is one of the greatest girls I know. She's been through a lot and never fails to end up being positive about it. She calls and talks to me more than just about anyone, and is genuinely interested in how I'm doing. She's so sweet and always makes me smile. I love you girly :)

There's a bunch of other people that could and should be on this list, and if you aren't don't be offended!!! Just shoot me a message and I will dedicate a post to you :) Anyway those are just a few of the people I am grateful for, and if you're reading this, I'm grateful for you too!

Today I am grateful for the wonderful country I live in. I wouldn't be who I am if I didn't live in such an amazing place. I am so grateful for the rights I have because I live here, as well as they many people who fought and suffered so I could have those rights. I love my country and the rights and privileges that go along with it. We're lucky people to live where and how we do.

Today Randy and I went to the temple. It was awesome. I love walking down the street to the temple and how it's always so busy because there are always loads of college students waiting to go.

Anyway, that's all for tonight :) I have to go obsessively look over the election tracker :)

Today I am grateful for chocolate. I ate a lot of it today. And I love love love love it. Chocolate and I have been best friends ever since I can remember. It was probably even in the womb. Chocolate has yet to let me down. It's so warm and melty and delicious and it's one of the best things that has ever happened to me. True story.

On a side note I got flowers today. They are pretty.

On another side note I made soup today. And it was really good even though the rolls turned out funny. They were still yummy.

It's been a fairly average Monday. But I like Mondays in Provo. :)

Today I am thankful for answers to prayers. There are lots of ways in which Heavenly Father answers my prayers, and I am grateful for each one of them, even the ones I don't like.

Today I got an answer I've been asking about for almost a month. When the announcement was made that girls could go on missions at 19, I started thinking about it for the first time in a few years. I had thought about it before and felt like it wasn't for me, and then with the new age change, I thought about it again. A lot. I prayed and read my scriptures and tried really hard to figure out what course my life needed to take.

So after lots of prayer, fasting, and study, I have reached the conclusion that I'm not going on a mission. I would absolutely love it and I know I would be blessed for it, but for some reason I'm not supposed to go. At least not any time soon. Who knows maybe when I'm 23 and single I'll rethink it again. But right now I know there are other things I'm supposed to do. I am just so thankful that I had the opportunity to study it out in my mind and make a decision, and have that decision confirmed by the Spirit. I can't tell you how many times a mission would be on my mind, and I would flip open my scriptures to a random page, and the first verse I read would say something about "remain where you are" or "stand fast in the place you are" or "establish your home first" or something like that.

Anyway the long story short is that prayers are answered and I am so grateful for that. Especially today.

So like some of my other blogger friends (cough cough Ashley cough cough) I think I'm going to try this daily thankful post. I have so so so many things to be thankful for so I want to have a record of them. For posterity.

November 1--The Gospel. I would literally be worthless without the Gospel in my life. I love it with all of my heart. I love knowing that I have someone who loves me enough to live and die for me. I love the knowledge that there is a plan for me and that at any time, I can find help and comfort.

November 2--My family. My family is absolutely wonderful. They're my best friends, most trusted advisers, most honest critics, and the people who love me the most. I wouldn't be the person I am today if it wasn't for my amazing parents, and my fun siblings. I am the luckiest person in the world to have the family I do. I tell my mom everything, my dad is so good to me when I don't deserve it, my brother looks out for me and is always ready to help, my little sisters make me laugh, are always there for me and are such great examples to me.

November 3--My best friend. Randy Low is literally the best friend a person could ask for. He forgives me when I don't deserve it, he looks out for me more than anyone else, he makes me laugh when I don't even want to smile, he does the sweetest things for me on a constant basis, he literally gets more more than anyone else, and he makes my heart stop. I could go on and on and on about him but let's just say, that boy has been there for me through everything and I am lucky to be able to say he's my very best friends.

So stay tuned for more thankful posts :)