So we had a Fiddler night where the leads got together to sing. It was so great. Emotional, but great. For the first time I let myself think about what would happen if my sisters, or my friends who are like my sisters for that matter, chose something that would take them out of my life. I can't even imagine. I can't imagine my two little sisters leaving or not knowing when I'll see my friends again. I can't imagine being a mother and having my children, my heart, walk around outside of my body, out of my control, for the rest of my life. I like controlling things. And just like last year, going to that rehersal and hearing the emotion of every single song, made me realize I can't. And that has to be ok.