I've been to the cemetery before. I'm not sure why it was a little different this time. Memorial Day always holds a trip to Salt Lake to see my great-grandparents that I don't really remember. My grandparents laugh at memories, and my mom always tells me that I'm so much like my Grandma and that we would've loved each other, and that she always had candy in her house. It was fun to go with my younger cousins and share with them the stories I've heard for years, about people I hardly knew. This time everything was more poignant, probably because I've gotten more sentimental in the past few years. But I'm really glad I have, and I'm glad I got to go spend some time with family this weekend.

I recently did a segment on The Matt Townsend Show about helping teenagers. My specific section was about what I wish I had known when I was 15.

WHOA I have been MIA lately. I'm sorry dearest friends. Give me about a month and I'll be a lot less busy.

So Mother's Day happened while I was so distant and bad at blogging.

It was great:)

My angel mom is the best person that I know and I feel very lucky to be her daughter.

In Church on Sunday we talked about a concept I want to share with you.

Our teacher shared a story about a woman who felt guilty for not making heart cookies on Valentine's Day and not hand crafting all the kids Valentines, for not throwing a party and having a pink and red dinner. Later that night, she and her kids had a dance party. It was then she realized that she wasn't crafty mom or chef mom...she was crazy dance party mom. And that was what her kids needed.

This idea struck me. Your kids need YOU as their mom. They don't need anybody else or the things that anybody else does. They need your best effort and that is IT.

Kids want their moms to be happy. We appreciate your sacrifices more than we can possibly explain, but we also want you to have fun sometimes. We want to help you put yourself first sometimes. So let us, and help us know what you need from us. We hate feeling like a burden on you...we hate thinking that you can't do or be something because you have to be our mom. Live your life and let us be a part of it. Let us help you just like you've helped us for our whole lives.

I love you mom! I'm the luckiest daughter alive because I got intelligent-funny-beautiful-creative-witty-sarcastic-selfless-tender-spiritual-andamillionotherthings mom.

Lastly...a small rant from me. All around me I see people who are pretending. Pretending to be something they aren't. The best decision I ever made was to stop caring what other people think. To love being alone with myself...and to let more of my real self show. To be authentic. To go with my first instinct. To be Maddy...no apologies, no shame, no regret. I make mistakes, it's true. And some people still don't like me. But I am so happy that I like myself. People aren't always going to like you...no matter what you act like or who you try to be. So why not be yourself, and like that person?

Basically what I'm trying to say, is that it's easy to be self-absorbed...to only care about ourselves and the image we give off. I'm trying to be less selfish...and being myself has helped me do that. I don't have to worry about acting like this or that...I am just me. And that gives me a lot of time  to focus on other people. It might be worth trying for you too.

Because this was an extra long wordy and ranting post...I'd like to give you all a little treat to end it:)

Dear friends:

I feel like I gripe about how busy I am all the time...but I am BUSY! Life is great though:)

I'm a bit jealous of all my friends around the world on their study abroads and such, but I'm having a blast reporting for 11 News and working for BYU Radio. It's fun to meet all kinds of people and learn new things every single day!

I also enjoy baseball games with Cosmo and my friends.

Guys, summer break is here.

Well for me it's not a break, I'm still in school. But there's something wonderful about waking up early in the morning to the sun, to walking around on campus without a jacket, and to getting into your car with the steering wheel a little too hot to touch.

I have a long list of things I want to do this summer, as well as a BYU bucket list for things I want to do with my last year here at the Y. I figure if I post it on my blog, I'll be more likely to stick to it! So here we go:)

1. Rooftop Concert

Friends, life is always so busy.

Spring semester began this week, and I'm a crazy busy girl now.

I go to school ALL DAY on Monday and Wednesday, have some classes on Friday, and on my "off days" I go in to work, do homework, and go out for my reporting class to get interviews and footage. Basically, I'm on the go all the time. It's ok, it's just for six weeks right?

This little blog will probably be somewhat neglected, so here's my apology in advance.

I just have to say how much I love my job/major. I picked something that was perfect for me. I LOVE talking to people and getting to know lots of different people. That, plus writing, means I'm in heaven.

Do what you love and you'll never work a day in your life! Sometimes I do feel like I'm working, and working way more than I anticipated, but 99% of the time I love what I'm doing.

Just a few photos for you to see what's been up besides school and work!